Hello Everyone,
I really needed these exercises this week. It was a rough week for me at work. I tend to do pretty well with stress and other peoples lack of kindness but it was a bit overwhelming this week. The exercise was a bit difficult considering my state of mind but I listened to it several times and finally, I was able to release some of my bitterness that I have been holding all week. It helped me to put things back into perspective, let go of the negative and focus on the positive. I do think that I get myself in that negative mental state because I care too much and don't understand others actions and behaviors but we have to care in a healthy manner and accept others. We all have flaws and we need to focus our energy on the good and not the bad.
All of us need to practice on "mental workouts". We do not hesitate to workout our physical body yet we tend to forget about our mind. It consists of two parts; loving-kindness and the subtle mind, wisdom. These are essential elements that have the ability to heal therefore driving us to flourish. Everyday is a "mental workout" for me I just don't necessarily do it in the most effective approach. I will take time out everyday to bring myself to a calm state and reflect on the positive in others as well as myself instead of focusing on the bad. I am sure it will be an ongoing workout that will never end but will always be necessary.
Jacqui
I think you made a great point about focusing on the good, instead of the bad, aspects of ourselves and others. We tend to point out those flaws and emphasize their negative effects, rather than letting them go or overlooking them.
ReplyDeleteI’ve met people that begin speaking badly of others immediately after they leave; ‘Did you see what she was wearing? Awful!’ or ‘Can you believe she’s dating him? He’s such a jerk!’ – I think people should make an effort to see the good in and about people. They should try to find a positive remark, and eventually, it will come naturally.
I’ve pointed this out to people before- they usually don’t like it! I almost feel like I’m being negative by pointing out this ‘flaw’ in others. So, I tried asking questions like, ‘Did you like her hair? It was so pretty!’ or some other form of switching the conversation to a positive note…I’m slowly noticing a change!
I think it’s great that you want to focus on the good, keep up the positivity!
Jacqui,
ReplyDeleteI agree with you and R. Mitchell about focusing on the positive. The loving-kindness exercise was meant to achieve precisely that. In a world full of negativity, it will do us lots of good if we develop some 'mind muscles' which will enable us to be in control of our attitudes and our moods. Though it will take time, I believe that it is possible to develop such a mental state.
I too struggled with the exercise and had to listen to it quite a few times before it was effective. I think it's great that you were able to rid yourself of the stress from the week, because after about my sixth time of listening to it I was able to experience similar effects. I think this exercise is helpful when you are angry or upset with someone. It suggests and helps you lose the anger and negativity and inspires love and kindness towards the person who upset you. Overall, I appreciated your post!
ReplyDeleteJacqui: I agree with you in that I also practice loving-kindness everyday. If we do not we should all try. Dealing with individuals is challenging especially when we do not see eye-to-eye on things. I try really hard to see others prospective on things before I make judgments'.
ReplyDeleteAs a manager I need to be open-minded and not quick to judge others. This is a daily learning experience and the things that sticks with me the most is that, not everyone thinks like me.
There have been several occasions when my instructors, mostly the younger ones, respond to be in a very reprimanding tone. They tell me what to do and have no problem expressing their disappointment in my decisions. I would never talk to my supervisor like that but I try to understand what brought them to that state before I speak firmly with them. The majority of the time I ended up listening to them and rarely get the change to speak my opinion. My goal is to end the conversation hoping we saw eye to eye on the situation and that it ends with a positive note.
The exercise was difficult for me as I was very tired when I listened to it and feel asleep. The chimes and sound of water was very relaxation. The long gaps of silence was just enough time to nap.
Cherie
I couldn't agree with you more Jacqui. It can be SO hard to let go of the negative and focus on the positive. With how busy and stressful everyday life can be, having people around you that are negative can sometimes rub off on you. I know sometimes at work I catch myself falling into the negative chatter that people will have in the lunch room and I just have to kind of kick myself back into the right direction and get that negativity out!
ReplyDeleteMental workouts really should be incorporated into our everyday lives just as we incorporate physical workouts. As a society I feel health is becoming bigger and bigger and more people are catching onto the trend, which is awesome! BUT what about mental health. It is however the most important. You can be as physically healthy as you want and still suffer from anxiety or depression. I love doing these exercises and totally want to start working these mental workouts into my daily schedule.
Jacqui,
ReplyDeleteGreat outlook on life! It is easy to get caught up in the negative in people. I have always tried to teach my kids that most people act out for a reason. It is important to be mindful of what others are going through rather than just getting bitter towards them. First of all, it does nothing positive for us to get bitter, and we do not show our best side of ourselves when we make hasty judgments about others without considering the fact that they may have things that they are going through as well. We really never know what another person could be going through. If we think about that possibility, it is easier to feel loving-kindness toward others (even if in reality they aren't going through anything). Our outlook on others is reality to us. Good blog!
Amy
I have been having a rough week as well. I hope that yours is better soon. I really like this weeks exercise and plan to practice it a few more times until I feel I have achieved what I need to. Due to my stress and every thing going on in my life right now I was unable to completely relax due to my worries and stresses. I like the point that you made about remembering to exercise our minds. Just like you stated one will remember to workout their physical being and need to remember to work out their minds as well. There is so much negativity in the world today that I barely turn on the television or stay up to date with all the happenings in the world. Maybe that is silly of me but I do not like negativity and that seems to be all that is in the news and what not.
ReplyDelete